Friday, 4 December 2015

The Syria vote has given way for Facebook scaremongers.

I am someone who is very much used to arguments of a political nature. However, having a degree in journalism and politics and studying with others who had an active interest in current affairs meant that my arguments were usually with other people who had very sound points to make.

Recently, a lot of social media ‘chat’ has been circulating around Daesh and the decision made to take action in Syria. It would seem everyone is suddenly a fierce political campaigner.

Friday, 2 October 2015

WAKE UP AMERICA, your gun laws are fucked!

Another day, another shooting. Good morning, America.

 It's not gang related, it's not a paid hit. It's another psychopath shooting at a college. It was only the other day some freak with orange hair got his hands on a gun and ran rampage in a cinema, and yet another person who should not have had access to a gun managed to have his way and kill nine innocent people in the process. It should not be this easy. America, WAKE UP. You are enabling these tragedies.

Monday, 28 September 2015

Why you shouldn't date somebody 'cool.'

When you're at school there was always that 'cool' group. The girls who grew their boobs two years before everyone else and learnt to pluck their eyebrows first. (Jokes on them now, bushy eyebrows are in and their over-plucked 2001 pencil-brows look horrific. Who has the last laugh now, Holly who made fun of me for not knowing what masterbating was when I was 13?!) Then there were the boys, the guys who smoked and got those mini Nike backpacks that said 'Just Do it' across the back. There is always a 'cool' group. They aren't even necessarily particularly cool, they are just deemed to be by everyone else. Well, although they are different as you get older, there are still 'cool' guys kicking about. And I'm about to warn you against dating one of them.


Sunday, 20 September 2015

"Girls Can't Be Friends With Boys" : A Personal Post

I have always had guyfriends. I got on with them better in general - I have weird dirty banter and sarcasm girls don't always warm to and I feel less paranoid that they're all sitting around my Facebook on a Friday night laughing at my bad outfit choices and cellulite.

Friday, 21 August 2015

It's Okay To Not Want Kids! A List of Reasons & a Vagina Story.

I am all for having a little bundle of joy that you can love and take care of and raise and make a family with. But for me, that bundle of joy is going to be a dog at most. I'm all for other people having kids, just not me. And in the same way that I wouldn't say to someone who has a kid 'you'll regret that down the line when you change your mind', I don't want people assuming that I will change my mind too. 

Monday, 10 August 2015

A Mish Mash of Terrible Date Stories

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It's 2015, and getting a date is harder than ever. The days of approaching people in a bar or - God forbid - on the streets is a thing of times gone past. It's all about Tinder now. Or Happn. Or Facebook. Or whatever new app there is that I haven't heard of yet. (If you want to check out my post on online dating tips for checking if someone's a psychopath or not click here.) 

So once you've managed to secure yourself a date, the event itself needs to impress. I got talking to some of my gal-pals to dig into some of their less-than-impressive experiences with men. They had some gold-dust.


Sunday, 26 July 2015

Three Essential Summer Dresses | OOTD

There are three types of dresses you need to get you through the summer. The shape and cut should vary to suit your shape - I always opt for a skate or something to cover the tum-tum area, but this is just my preference. I'm going to skim through the three dresses to get you through the summer in this post. 



Thursday, 2 July 2015

Moisturising Lips: The Ultimate Product Combo

I wear lipstick every single day. It's an addiction, which can lead to dry cracked lips quite easily. I'm quite lucky in that my lips never get too dry, and I make sure to Carmex them every morning before I do my makeup. When my lips are feeling in need of a bit of TLC, this power-duo from Lush have got me covered. (This is not a paid for post!) 

The first is their Lip Scrub in the flavour Bubblegum. I just want to mention now that it is edible, and tastes delicious. so sweet and (funnily enough) like bubblegum. Any cosmetic that allows you to eat it and actually taste good is a winner in my books.

This is super inexpensive and lasts ages. This is my third tub in the last two years, so a little really does go a long way. I'll use it maybe once a week, and just dab a tiny bit onto my finger and rub in circular motions into my lips. It's a sugar-scrub exfoliant, so any dry skin will fall away. I cannot emphasise enough how good it smells. 

After that I take a tiny bit of their Lip Balm in Honey Trap, and smother that all over my lips too. This is not your regular smooth, oily balm. It feels almost matte, probably due to it being made from honey. It's a bit thicker and you need to have a good rub of the pot to get enough onto your finger. (I tried to make that sentence sound less dodgy, but couldn't. Apologies.) It smells nice, but is not edible, so don't try to eat this one. This is a pricier lip balm at I think around £6 and it doesn't last too long, it's a little pot. But it does really moisturise the lips, especially post-exfoliating.

I use these two items together perhaps once a week, and my lips stay plump, soft and moisturised despite the layers of matte MAC lippies I slather them in every day! An absolute dream combo. What do you use to moisturise your lips? (I hate Vaseline - just me?!) 

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Wednesday, 1 July 2015

5 Words to Ruin a First Date

I have this best friend. Her name is Daisy. She has an afro which is sometimes blue and sometimes pink, she makes earrings for fun and is generally much cooler than I am. Every single moment I spend with her is spent laughing, and even though we are on other sides of the country, I heart her. A little while ago, we picked up on the trending hashtag #5WordsToRuinADate and started having a conversation about it. The results were bloggable.
D: 'I'm in an acapella band.'
C: 'My waxing took 8 hours.'
'Wanna see my stamp collection?'
'I'm into fantasy bedroom role-play.'
'...Worked a summer in Maga.'
' I'm waiting on test results.'
'Nan's just parking the car.'
'You remind me of Miley.'
'Just checking my Myspace profile.'
'You probably haven't heard them.'
'My cousin is pretty hot.'
'I did my fair time.'
'Do you like Little Mix?'
'I always vote for UKIP.'
'I play World of Warcraft.'
'I shagged that girl once.'
'Russel Brand is a revolutionary.'
'Drug of choice is meth.'
'Sexual inequality doesn't exist anymore.'
'Girls say I'm too big.'
'I play on Men's Hockey.'
'Ed Miliband's my spirit animal.'
'You look like my Mum.'
'I don't conform to society.'
'So, I was watching Hairspray..'
'Do you even lift though?'
'I can use clingfilm instead?'
'Drakes lyrics are so relatable'.
What would be the worst 5 words you could hear on a first date?
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Thursday, 18 June 2015

Ignorant Voices Everywhere Are Shouting About the Yulin Dog Meat Festival

A petition has been launched against the Yulin Dog Meat Festival, which takes place in GuangXi, China. When this article was written it had amassed 561,285 signatures.

 Let’s break down the reasons that are acceptable explanations for supporting this cause, as laid out in the petition letter itself:

 1.    The fact that China has the second largest number of rabies in the world, causing huge economic costs and hundreds of deaths. Continuation of this festival implies a lack of vigilance at tackling this public health concern.

2.    The fact that dog theft is a huge problem and a major route of supply for the dog meat industry. Allowing the festival to continue shows a lack of concern for the dog theft that is happening, a crime which is heartbreaking for caring owners who fall victim.

3.    Food safety issues – many dogs involved are ill or contaminated and not properly checked or examined the way they should be before being slaughtered for meat. 

If any of the above three are the reason you signed the petition, you can stop reading. Your argument is educated and your concern is genuinely for the people of China. I salute you in your efforts in raising awareness to make China a safer place.

If your opinion rings familiar with either of the below points, I want to explain why you should not be signing this petition:

1.    The animals are inhumanely killed.

2.    You do not agree that dogs should be eaten, and the festival endorses this belief.
Let’s tackle the first point, which is perhaps the most common reason that the media is ganging up to fight against the Dog Meat Festival. This point is backed by animal-rights fan Ricky Gervais, who stated 
"I’ve seen the footage that HSI has captured on video, and it breaks my heart. I will never forget the look of bewilderment and fear on the faces of these poor animals — the dogs and cats await a horrible fate. No animal deserves to be treated like this."

(I would like to point out at this stage that Ricky Gervais is not a vegetarian.)

 So the issue is that these animals are afraid, awaiting a horrible fate and inhumane slaughter? I see. And we don’t have this in the UK? 

I agree, it’s upsetting to see this imagery but people seem to be jumping very quickly to be outraged at what is happening across the world in China, when it happens here in the UK too. There are unfortunately hundreds of slaughterhouses carrying out ‘inhumane’ acts of slaughter in order to feed us hungry Brits our burgers and sausages for dinner. Perhaps your time would be better spent trying to change the issues in the country you live in, rather than worrying about another nation. At least if we fight against inhumane slaughter in Britain our voices have a better chance of actually making a difference. 

Of course, this is just my opinion, but my second point will make you realise there are better ways to spend your time then signing this petition to end cruelty to these animals.  


I would like to point out that at no point does the petition actually address the way in which the animals are slaughtered, or tackling inhumane practice.  It mentions the animals being slaughtered publically, and the effect this can have on children in particular, but at no point is the actual slaughtering act discussed. You signing this petition will in no way fight against the inhumane methods used on the dogs, so if this was your main reason for signing the petition then there’s absolutely no point. You should have read what you were signing properly.

You can argue it's 'raising awareness' but if you are making a brazen online presence to support humane treatment of these animals, don't you think your time would be better spent supporting petitions that actually fight your actual cause, rather than jumping on the bandwagon of a closely-linked petition that has absolutely no impact on what you actually want? (For the ill-treatment of the dogs to end.) 
Food for thought. Excuse the pun.

And perhaps the most ignorant and uneducated opinion: You do not agree with eating dogs. The key word here is OPINION. This is what you believe, and you believe this because you have been brought up in a culture where dogs are recognized as loyal and loving family pets, not food. Your opinion is how you feel, due to your circumstances. Your opinion is not the only opinion, and it is not the opinion of hundreds of Chinese who eat dog meat in the same way we in the UK rabbit. (Which, may I add, many people own as a pet.)

 It is a part of their culture to eat dog meat, whether or not we agree with it. Who are we to impose our Western opinions and views on their traditions and culture? Do we not have our own animal issues in the UK to deal with?  It was only in 2013 that cosmetic testing on animals became illegal, yet we sit here thinking we are high and mighty advocators of animal rights. 

If you want to sign a petition about harsher punishments for those involved in dog-fighting rings in the UK, go ahead. If you want to sign a petition about making hitting a dog illegal in the UK, go ahead. But to sign a petition because you don’t agree in another countries choice of food… Well that’s really none of your business, is it? 

It would be like Indonesian citizens (the country with the largest Muslim population) creating a petition against the UK selling pork and slaughtering pigs. Goodbye to our pulled-pork sandwiches, because Indonesia doesn’t like us going against their beliefs. Am I putting this into perspective yet?

 To sum up my argument clearly for anybody who has struggled to grasp the main point, it is as follows: 
Be educated about what you are signing before you sign it.

 Do I personally agree with eating dogs? No! I have dogs at home who I consider family. 

Do I personally agree with the way they are killed or think that it is humane or moral? No!

Do I think that my views are the only views? No! 

 I do not agree with Westerners trying to impose their beliefs on other cultures and ramming their opinion down the throats of other nations. 
Make sure you are signing the petition for the RIGHT reasons: to help China improve as a country. 

If you want to register support for ending inhumane slaughtering of dogs in China, I suggest you look for another petition because this one is not going to help you fulfil your goal. (Try this one.

If you want to end dogs being eaten in general (even if slaughtered humanely), I suggest you stop being so closed-minded and accept other cultures practices.

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Sunday, 7 June 2015

| Balayage Summer Hair Tutorial | How I lightened my dark brown hair to dark blonde

Hey guys! This post will briefly explain how I took my hair from dark brown: 

To a balayaged dark blonde:

Firstly, I had to bleach my hair. I did this twice, using the Jerome Russell B Blonde High Lift Bleach Powder. This is for use on dark to medium hair and I got it in Boots or Superdrug. (Linked). Worth nothing that when you buy this, you also need to buy the lotion to go with it. (I used volume 30 but for stubborn hair maybe try the 40.) I mixed it up in a ceramic bowl and bought this tinting brush from Superdrug as well, and then applied it using the technique illustrated in this Youtube video. My boyfriend kindly did the backs for me!

I bleached my hair twice in two days, leaving the bleach in for 45 minutes each time. The end result was a yellow/orange mix which I knew would happen. Your hair will always go orange if you are bleaching it and it has been dyed previously. It's unavoidable. I left my hair for 24 hours to rest, before adding the toner. The only way to get the orange and warm tones out of bleached hair is to use a toner or purple tinted dye. Any hair dye with the words 'cool' or 'ash' in the name will be purple tinted. To take my hair from the picture on the left to the picture on the right below, I used a permanent Clairol Nice 'n' Easy dye in the shade Natural Dark Cool Blonde #7 (formally 106D). As you can see below this eradicated any warm tones.

The dye was not put on my roots, only on the ends and where it had been bleached. I'm not going to lie and say that my hair wasn't damaged because it was. This was done after I had about 5 inches cut off so my hair was in a stronger condition to take the bleach. If I hadn't had my hair cut I'm not sure how it would have survived. It is now pretty dry, but not breaking or to the point where I can't use heat on it. I'm using various products on it at the moment to strengthen and condition it which seem to be working. I'll do a blog post on this soon so keep your eyes peeled! I think the colour came out well though and is much better for the summer. Let me know if you decide to try a balayage/ombre effect too!

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Monday, 18 May 2015

The Trials and Tribulations of Seeming Like a Bitch.

I have always found making close friends a very slow process, and never thought much of it. I just put it down to my short attention span for people who cancel plans a lot. (AKA: 90% of the population.) It wasn't until I met my boyfriends family this weekend that I realised the problem goes much deeper than that. Some may call it being socially awkward, I am calling it 'Seeming Like a Bitch Syndrome.' (SLAB). A close relative to 'Chronic Bitch Face Syndrome.' (See here for more details.) The combination of these two syndrome is fatal for ones social life. 


Extreme difficulty in feigning laughter when you don't genuinely find something funny.

Moderate difficulty in finding something funny if you don't know the person very well.

Not being a 'touchy feely kinda gal.' AKA: Opting (every time) for a curt and polite nod rather than a hug and the (God-forbid) dreaded double cheek kiss.

Experiencing long periods of extended silence in which you genuinely can't think of what to talk to a person about because you aren't sure what is appropriate.
Severe difficulty feigning an interest in anything that really doesn't interest you. (AKA. babies.) 

Extreme difficult carrying out 'small talk', probably due to the above point. 

Showing more interest and enthusiasm for things such as dogs and food over other people.

Enjoying your own company and a night in with pizza and Netflix over going out clubbing and drinking every weekend. 


The primary factor which causes SLAB Syndrome (in my personal experience) is as follows:

My sense of humour is
a) Extremely dry and sarcastic and
b) usually involves things that are highly inappropriate or too politically incorrect to say in front of people I do not know very well, for fear of leaving a lasting bad impression.

These two factors of my personality means that I end up trying to put on another persona (a polite and politically correct one) around people I do not know very well. This in turn leaves me with the symptom:

Experiencing long periods of extended silence in which you genuinely can't think of what to talk to a person about because you aren't sure what is appropriate.

Once I have become aware that I am showing signs of the above symptom, it all goes downhill from there. I close up even more and become extremely conscious of what everyone else is probably thinking of me.

(me again)


Combine the above scenario with an unfortunate case of Chronic Bitch Face Syndrome and you have yourself the very real embodiment of someone who seems like a complete and total bitch. "Who was that moody girl with a face like a slapped arse standing in the corner not speaking or joining in the convo?"  Yep, that would be me, thanks.


I wish I was bubbly, I wish I could meet people and hug and laugh like old friends after 5 minutes with them. But the thing is, I can't. I'm dry and cynical and honestly probably won't find you funny unless you're making a joke about something completely politically incorrect, or are fantastically witty with excellent and extravagant vocabulary use.

I may be monotonous and come across like I don't care, but I assure you I do. 
I am a nice person. Really, I am. I may not be warm and welcoming, bubbly or invitingly friendly. But I always mean well. It just takes about 6 months for me to open up enough for you to see that. By which time you've probably decided I'm a huge boring frigid wench who you don't want to speak to. Sorry about that.
Bottom line is: It's okay to be slightly emotionally detached - we are the Kourtney Kardashians of the world and that's okay. We can't all be Kim or Khloes. (Thanks Sarah for helping me realise this.) 
 (Kourtney and I are one.)
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Thursday, 30 April 2015

A Guide: London Tube Etiquette

Nothing irks me more than people with poor tube etiquette. I understand that it's rammed on the platform, you're late to work, you haven't had your morning coffee yet and have your face in a man's sweaty armpit. I do. I get it. And while the sentence should end with 'but that's no reason to get rude', I feel like sometimes some people really do need a punch in the face to realise they are making everybody's lives much more difficult than they need to be. 
We all have the same goal : Get from A to B. Let's make this happen as quickly and painlessly as possible by following this guide for idiots.

1. Stand on the right. STAND ON THE FUCKING RIGHT. If you are approaching an escalator and you know you haven't the stamina to make it to the top, start edging towards the right as you approach the escalator. Do not, I repeat, DO NOT get 'stuck on the left', try to make your way up, realise you can't make it, refuse out of pride to step to the right and end up clawing your way to the top at the pace of a salted snail, holding up everyone behind you.

2. Wait for people to get off the tube before you start to get on. It's manners. The train won't leave until everybody is off, and until a good amount of people have gotten on. Pushing your way on before everyone else is off makes it ten times harder for people trying to get off to do so quickly. You're slowing everyone else down because you won't wait an extra 4 seconds for a seat.

3. Give your seat up for the pregnant and elderly. Don't be a dick and pretend to be asleep.

4. Don't fucking try to hold the doors open so you can get on. What you are effectively doing is causing a tiny, tiny delay in which the tube shuts and then re-opens the doors just so you can get on. If everybody on every tube was as selfish as you we would be delayed by hours and never get anywhere. There is never a tube more than 4 minutes away,  (in rush hour 2 minutes!) so just bloody wait for the next one. 

5.  Don't try to talk to strangers on the tube, especially during morning rush hour. Nobody has time for this, no matter how friendly you think you're being.

6. Make a conscious effort to walk in a straight line. There is nothing more frustrating than being in a rush, trying to overtake someone who is weaving in and out as they dawdle along so you end up dancing behind them like Taylor Swift trying to get past.

7. DO NOT GET OFF THE TUBE AND STAND IN FRONT OF THE DOOR WAITING FOR SOMEONE. You can make it 3 more steps further forwards and wait against the wall, thus not holding up everyone else trying to get off/onto the tube you've just exited.

8. DO NOT STAND IN THE MIDDLE OF AN EXIT / DOORWAY. You are in the underground, holding up everyone else behind you who are trying to get past. Step aside, this really is common sense.

9. Not having your Oyster card ready at the barrier, stopping at the barrier to locate it. Was it a surprise that the barrier was there? No? Then why weren't you fucking ready for it?

10. If you have a backpack for the love of God, take if off and put it between your feet when you get onto a busy tube. Imagine how many more people would fit on if everyone who had a backpack did this.

To be honest I'm embarrassed I even had to write this post because some people have literally no common sense or courtesy, but there it is. Next time you get onto a tube may you remember all of these things and leave in the peaceful knowledge that you are better than 50% of the population in London. Congratulations.
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Wednesday, 8 April 2015

Candid Callie: Finding My Own Style

I have been through numerous embarrassing phases in my lifetime. "This is not a phase Mum, it's just who I am!" I've learnt some things along the way.

When I was 14 it was the 'scene' look. I sported heavy raccoon-style eyeliner (think Taylor Momsen but less expertly applied) and white streaks in my hair, which was of course back brushed, sprayed into a ridiculously sweeping side-parting and covered in as may bow clips as I could find. Anything hot pink and black was the coolest thing ever and my wardrobe looked like a dark japanese anime had exploded into it. I was into boys who hung out at skate parks with Phase 1 Justin Bieber hair. 
Style Icon: Brookelle Bones
Wishlist Item: Leopard print hair extension strips (yes they are a thing), and cigarettes. Not to smoke, just for the image.
Social Media of Choice: Myspace, duh.
Music Taste: Hadouken, Bring me the Horizon, Rise Against

When I was 16 it evolved slightly into a vintage/grunge phase. My hair remained just as big, and I discovered hair extensions so I could perfect the thick, messy, matted hair look. At one point I got a dreadlock put in at a Camden hair salon with beads in it. Yes, just one dreadlock. The makeup toned right down thank God, and for my wardrobe I opted for anything from a Brighton thrift shop. Black and tartan were my go-tos, alongside military boots and a pretty piece of jewellery to feminise it. I looked like a homeless person with good makeup most of the time, wearing clothes that were too big for me and trying to awkwardly pull it off. I was still into boys who hung out at skate parks with Phase 1 Justin Bieber hair. Most of them smoked a lot of weed now too. 
Style Icon: Miley Cyrus pre-melt down. (When she still had long hair.)
Wishlist Item: A battered old Mulberry bag would have been the dream.
Social Media of Choice: Facebook.
Music Taste: Enter Shikari were the favourite, but anything drum n bass or dub step. Pendulum, Chase & Status and Dillinja were big players.
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When I was 18 it all went downhill again. My style was anything slutty. The shorter and tighter, the better. My hair was finally at a good place in its life now, but I dressed how I thought boys liked me to look rather than how I liked to look. It wasn't flattering. My accessory of choice was vodka and I spent most of my time tottering around in 6 inch stilettos that I thought made me look good. In fact it made it look like I had shit myself because I could barely walk, so I just waddled about instead. I found a penchant for piercings, and got about 12 done in quick succession. My ideal man wore band tees, never washed his hair and had 8 inch holes in his ears. The type of man who if I saw now I would refer to as a man-baby. (Someone who never grew up post-puberty.) 
Style Icon: Rebecca Fox, Megan Fox, Mel Clarke
Wishlist Item: A full sleeve and a pair of stripper heels.
Social Media of Choice: Tumblr.
Music Taste: Anything playing at da clubbbb. (Cringe cringe cringe cringe)

When I was 20 I spent my time trying so hard to dress cooler than I was. I don't have the confidence or the personality for the outfits I desperately tried to pull off.  My hair and makeup had settled down into a comfortable zone, but in stark contrast my outfits were a mesh of the brightest colours and zaniest patterns I could find. If it clashed, great. Anything to stand out from the crowd. The tackier the better. Huge plastic gold hoops?! Sign me up! Leopard print was what the majority of my wardrobe was made of. Street-style pieces like Adidas bombers were also a favourite. Any guy with tattoos and a snapback cap was a dreamboat. 
Style Icon: Anyone remotely cool. Street style was a big influencer.
Wishlist Item: A pair of high heel leopard print boots would have been the dream.
Social Media of Choice: Back to Facebook.
Music Taste: I found my music taste around this time. Mostly acoustic covers.
Now I dress for myself. My style is boring compared to how it used to be. It's quiet and you wouldn't notice it. I'm comfortable. I've retained some loves over the years. I lean towards cleaner, scandi style outfits. Tailoring is something I love now, and I'm learning to dress for my body. In a contrast to a few years ago I'll always lean towards blacks, whites, beiges and nudes. I go for a good staple, and pieces I love will tend to comprise of lace, florals, leather and bretton stripes. I don't know if this is still just a phase, but for once I feel like I'm dressing because I like the way I look rather than to please anyone else, and in finding things that flatter my figure I feel more confident. I think that's the key to finding your true style. Don't follow the trends for the sake of it, wear what you like because it makes you feel good, and you will always look confident and beautiful. A man who treats me right, is respectful and an absolute sweetheart is what I want now. Only took me 23 years to work that one out!
Style Icon: Miranda Kerr, The Olsen Twins, Scandi style.
Wishlist Item: The perfect pair of high waist jeans. I still haven't found them.
Social Media of Choice: Instagram. Calliekazumi 
Music Taste: I'm sticking with my acoustic love for now. 
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